Tweets that deserve a slap

“Hubby away for three more sleeps. How will I cope??!!”  <– Crikey, it’s going to be touch and go for a while but hang in there, you can pull through.

“Cooking for one is not much fun 😦 Don’t think I’ll bother.”  <– same person as above

“Eating dinner on my own at home – hate it. So glad I’m not single.”  <– and again… swiftly unfollowed!

“I have the BEST wife EVER!!! Baby you totally rock!”  <– what irks me here is that we’re clearly supposed to respond saying ‘why? what did she do now?’ Do we really want to know? Or even care?

“Thank you to my lovely husband for my gorgeous new shoes/laptop/car/[insert item here] :-)”  <– nice, but why not buy it yourself?

“Who needs a hot water bottle when you have a husband?”  <– trust me, the hot water bottle is a lot less work

Any tweet / status update that includes the word ‘hubby’. Aaargh.

My tolerance level for smug marrieds is particularly low today, can you tell?

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10 thoughts on “Tweets that deserve a slap

  1. I feel you for sure as a fellow 31 and single female. I have more difficulty with facebook though. Alot of my married friends feel the need to broadcast these same complaints on there and its worse! Once they complain, their fellow married friends will “comment” on their status and add to the lame-ness! I’ve actually done a “Facebook fast” before 🙂

  2. I love the ‘hide’ function on Facebook to delete married (with baby) posts. Also, instead of going a fast, check out Singleton Revolution! it is a fun page with positive single power quotes.

    In response to cooking for one not being fun…seriously? You get to make whatever the hell you want! More garlic? OK! Mashed potatoes AND spaghetti? Pile it on! Marrieds are an odd bunch.

  3. I am right there with you on this! Whether it’s on Facebook or on the phone, I’m at my limit with this stuff. Of course my friends can feel free to vent, but I feel like sometimes it’s a little overboard.

    “I’m home alone this week…really hope he gets back soon, it’s lonely.” Um, really – is it? Here I am single and alone most nights, I guess I wouldn’t know?

    One of my friends (who has a great marriage and two healthy kids, and is trying for #3) had the nerve to tell me they were really worried they wouldn’t be able to have 5 kids. While I know she didn’t mean to be insensitive…does she really think I want to hear that when I’m not sure I’ll get to have ONE? 🙂

  4. Yes, why do married people feel the need to brag all the time? However, you never hear them brag about how they hate the annoying habits of their spouse, in-laws, or how their screaming kid kept them up all night. In general, Facebook/Twitter chatter is out of control. It used to bother me, but now I just laugh about how silly these people are. Isn’t it kinda sad that they can’t enjoy moments of solitude apart from their spouse? Have they lost their sense of self?

    Also, I personally wouldn’t announce the fact that I’m alone at home for security purposes.

  5. Are these Tweets for real?

    I am on Twitter but jeez, I don’t broadcast EVERYTHING!

    Yes I too, love the ‘hide’ button on FB as well!!

    These social networks are getting out of control.
    I kind of wish what happened to MySpace (you know, slowly but surely FADED??) happens to the rest — is that evil??

    Yea I’m on it but I won’t miss it that much when it’s gone. 😛

  6. Ugh, I hate that kind of crap! I see and hear it all the time and I swore I was the only one annoyed by it. Guess not (phew!). I find it strange that people don’t know how to be alone for a split second…but then again, I am sure people think I am stranger for being single pretty much all my life.

  7. Why oh why have I not found your blog sooner!

    I have a FB friend that constantly calls her husband “Mr Awesome” in her status update. She has been hidden for a few months now. Love hide.

  8. They’re insecure. That’s why they broadcast it. They want people to know they’re married, and believe that their lives are perfect as a result. If they were truly happy, they wouldn’t be wasting time on Facebook and Twitter posting sappy messages. They’d be living life.

    I’m so glad I don’t do social media. And I’m doubly glad I have no married friends. I refuse to befriend anyone who is married. The vast majority of them are -offline, in reality – hugely stressed and miserable.

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