Almost two years ago I had a falling out with two of my closest friends (let’s call them Friend A and Friend B). At the time I was very hurt and confused – particularly because I didn’t understand what had happened, and neither was willing to discuss it. The whole episode was very upsetting and to this day, it is unresolved.
I made peace with the situation eventually. And am fortunate to have plenty of other friends who are fun, loyal, supportive, encouraging and positive influences.
Recently I was invited to an event which Friend A would also be attending. I was a bit apprehensive about seeing her as this would be the first time we’d be in the same room with a small group of people for any period of time. I don’t particularly want to ressurect the friendship, but was OK with being cordial to her. Well, when she arrived, she wouldn’t even make eye contact so that I could greet her. She avoided me all night. I tried – honestly. But no – nothing from her side. And I see we’re no longer (limited) Facebook friends. *chuckle* Oh well, so be it.
I didn’t exactly study her but (without going into details) the impression I got was that she’s not all that happy. And instead of feeling smug, I feel concerned for her. What?! This is someone who was one of my best friends – who then cut me off cold. Instead of gloating ‘karma’s a bitch, isn’t she?’, I feel concerned. What’s with that?? But I do. Because even though we’re not friends anymore, I don’t wish either of them any ill, nor have I ever said anything nasty about them, despite our falling out. Whatever our differences, I wish only happiness, contentment and fulfilment for both Friend A and Friend B.
To Friend B’s credit, she has made several small attempts at reaching out to me over the years – although I also heard she’d said some unfounded and mean things about me too which made me question her motives. But she actually sent me a big olive branch via email this week. It seemed genuine and I appreciated it.
Isn’t it interesting how different people handle this sort of thing… and how we can surprise ourselves sometimes?