No, I don’t get it

This blog post is doing the rounds at the moment – a letter from a parent to his childless [childFREE, FFS!] friends about how as a parent, he just doesn’t have time or proper attention for his friends anymore.

I get that it’s supposed to be humorous, but really… it annoys me. For so many reasons, but the main one being that parents think that the stresses they’re under are way more important than the stuff their childfree kids have going on. I get that that comes from a place of sleep deprivation, etc. etc. but as many of the commenters on the post say, hey parents – you CHOSE to have kids. I make a big effort to keep in touch with my friends who have little ones, and to structure meetings around their schedules and needs. It would just be really nice if once or twice a year, my friends-with-kids initiated a child-free get-together where we can talk without being interrupted.

Just don’t belittle the stress I’m experiencing with my job / relationships / finances / whatever because I get 7.5 hours sleep a night because I’ve chosen not to have children (or not met someone I want to have them with).

What do you think about friends who vanish when the babies start arriving?

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4 thoughts on “No, I don’t get it

  1. I don’t really have friends with babies but I have friends who “vanish” once they are in a relationship/ meet someone new/ get married/ All they can talk about is who stressful planning a wedding is and blah blah blah. They do stop returning phone calls/ texts and emails and it’s really annoying. It makes me feel like these people aren’t worth hanging out with then.

  2. I once got a letter (with even more defensive undertones. maybe overtones) from my ex-best-friend like that. “These are all the reasons my stress and problems cause me to not give a f*ck about your life” is how it read to me. I don’t care what excuses you make; if you’re a sh*tty friend who makes no effort to maintain a relationship, there’s really nothing to miss without you in my life. Once they’re divorced, or things start to suck, and they find that all their married, propogating friends are not there for them….well, that’s when they can all go f themselves.

  3. I agree 100% on this post, I lost a couple of friends last year because they were always busy planning their wedding…I can’t even imagine what it will be like when they start having children. We are all usually busy nowadays, but true friends always find a moment to reply to a message or a call…those are the important friends to keep close to us.
    Love your blog 🙂

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