About

I’m single, I’m in my thirties. I love my life and am really comfortable with who I am. I’m independent and, admittedly, am a bit of a control freak.

Why do so many people want to see me married with kids?

I’m not anti-relationships or *shock* anti-men. I’d like to find Mr Perfect-for-me. It’s just that at the moment I’m single and it’s pretty cool.

So here’s to all those girls and guys who don’t feel that they need someone else to complete them and are living la single vida.

 

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19 thoughts on “About

  1. Great to find other 30-somethings out there that aren’t afraid to embrace their single lives with enthusiasm. I’ll be checking out your site more often – if you’re interested, I update biweekly on my own site celebrating the single life at (gasp) 30. Rock on, sista!

  2. @marilynkaydennis Sounds like you have 31 years’ experience of being a thirtysomething πŸ™‚ Here’s hoping you can do all those independent, cool things now πŸ™‚

  3. Hi,

    A very insightful blog you have here. Perhaps you could do an entry on where all the interesting, intelligent single 25-30 something women without kids are locked up, (I presume in a mental institute or something as there are none around here! :).

    Of course there are a *few* out there but they tend to weigh a lot more than me, (I’m 78kg at 5’11”) and I have a *general* rule on not dating women who will crush me to death in bed (fun as it may be to pop your clogs that way!)

    Don’t get me wrong I have my faults; well, lets call them “attributes of my charming character”, but am willing to work through them with someone. But all I get are women with baggage so heavy they need one of those little vehicles you see at airports to tow it all around with them.

    Anyhow enough jabbering on!

    Mark
    30 something guy
    Harrogate

  4. Hi Mark – thanks for stopping by. Funny that you’re wondering where the sane, 25-30something women are – we’re all wondering where our male equivalents are hiding!

    Speaking as someone on the upper end of your age scale, I love to hang out at markets (those trendy organic ones πŸ™‚ ), bookstores, coffee shops (sometimes behind my laptop but don’t let that put you off) – or in the evenings, at nice upmarket bars (so over rowdy pubs) or having dinner with friends in decent restaurants. I always think the meeting-someone-through-friends is a good way to find a date, but with my circle increasingly married/breeding, that’s not really an option anymore. Where do you go to meet women?

    Would be great to get a man’s viewpoint on this blog, so please do pop back often πŸ™‚

  5. My social circle is also now full of married/coupled people who are breeding, eww (eww as in kids, not the activity! heh). And even worse they don’t know of any single women!

    As for going out to meet women, I have done evening classes in art/pottery in the past, but unless you are into the “silver haired” ladies you ain’t going to have much luck there! I also feel a bit like a stalker if I go to some place where single women hang out then you approach them. It’s all about the signals! (see later on). I Occasionally go out around town, which is interesting now that I don’t drink any more.

    What you see are a bunch of drunk people staring at each other with the occasional vomiting and falling over (plus some dancing, if you can call it that). It is amazing how much alcohol and the “beer goggles” distort your view of what is actually going on. (I think the human race may have gone extinct if it where not for alcohol!)

    As a result unless you want someone to warm your bed, nights around the town a pretty useless; I mean you can’t even have a conversation due to the very loud music (you kids and your damn music, and yes get off my lawn!)

    I have used online dating sites (plenty of fish seems the best and is free), however I find many women are very “selective”, not single, emotionally damaged like a 20 car pile up or unlikely to respond to guys messages unless they fit the *exact* physical image they have in their head of Mr Shining Knight. I’m not bitter and have told I am attractive, I’m just more confused by these women who want to find love but do everything in their power to prevent them discovering it.

    As a result it seems the women I have encountered in the recent past have suffered from this and/or have had very bad baggage, to the point they cannot move forwards with it. I’ve even had one in tears over it on a first date! (an impasse nobody but her can fix unfortunately)

    I’ve also had a first date where the woman said, “I want kids in the next year, how about you?”. That was a shock especially since I was explicit about not been interested in kids beforehand! Needless to say the date wasn’t an overwhelming success.

    It is a crying shame since I found many of the women interesting on an intellectual front as well as physical appearance (there needs to be physical attraction otherwise it is just friendship imho). But it turns out there are very good reasons why they are single, the other good looking and interesting single women get snapped up very quickly. (or locked up in the basement? πŸ™‚ )

    From a guys point of view, we tend to let women know we are interested in them, but it is the woman who usually has the final decision if they want to go with that guy. The exception is of course for the “Alpha male” aka “Bad Boy” who just uses and abuses women.

    Also I am very bad at reading signals, which is quite common amongst us guys, and don’t play the whole mind games thing, I need a woman to say “Yes I am interested”, and tell them as such. If they don’t have the balls,.. erm.., confidence to tell me they are interested, well they aint really for me anyhow!

    Perhaps I should get some of that “Sex Panther Cologne” and see how that goes! πŸ™‚

    PS: feel free to email me if you want to ask some questions or get an opinion on things for a blog.

    Mark

  6. Mark, thanks for your looong comment πŸ™‚ Bear with me, I’m a bit busy with work at the moment, but I’ll do a special blog post soon to share my opinions on some of the issues/questions you’ve raised. Like ‘Sex Panther Cologne’ πŸ˜‰

  7. Sure I will agree to be 30 ‘something’:)…I have just read the first and latest entry but am very excited to catch up and follow along. I am a late thirty something from the GTA area who can related to this blog – a lot.

  8. Hi there!

    Shortstorybook.net is organizing a short story writing contest.

    We do think that you too might have a marvelous story to tell, one that is your own! So if you can compose it in not more than few words, we would want to hear from you. Also, you stand a chance to get your story published on our site and win cash prize of USD 100.

    β€œThen what are you waiting for? …put on your thinking cap and get writing. For registration and other information check – http://bit.ly/short-story-contest-2010

    Happy writing!

  9. Hi – I love your blog. Given your enjoyment of life as a single thirtysomething, this probably won’t be relevant, but I published a book last year aimed at real life Bridget Joneses. I would be happy to send you a copy of ‘Finding Mr Right: The Real Woman’s Guide to Landing That Man’ if you would like to take a peek. The title (chosen by my publisher) is a bit misleading – it’s really a number of perspectives on being single, (see website wwww.findingmrrightthebook.com). It’s not all about finding someone, but being happy with your life. Send me a mailing address if you would like me to put a copy in the mail for you.

    Best wishes
    Annie Harrison
    Canterbury, England

  10. Just wanted to give you a shout out after I saw your spot on ABC News tonight. I never seem to have any luck with the online dating thing myself, and have always thought the eHarmony matching system was bogus. Glad to see there are other people out there with the same feeling! Keep positive, there are nice guys out there (I like to think I’m one of them!).

  11. Hey Andrew – thanks for the note. Always good to hear from one of the nice guys. ABC News spot?!! For real? Please tell me more πŸ™‚

  12. Just leading to my 30 something…. so far busy enjoying my 30 πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

    but yeah at times I am in dilemma of where there to change life at 30 or wait more….

    dreaming of not dreaming is difficult….

    but loved your blog and I am sure I will keep coming to it.

    Love!
    Bhavika

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